Abstinance, Natural Family Planning & Abortion

I had this comment from James about my post "Watch How Differently Planned Parenthood Deals With This Death.": "I know we are going crazy protesting against Abortions; however, have we lost the reason why abortions are being considered???? It’s called “Relations” and most of these are out of marriage…this is what we need to be discussing in order to stop putting the band aid on abortions…then we will see less of them taking place…Please, let’s talk more about Abstinence…"

I have to make some comments on what he said.

1st of all, I don't think most of us have lost the reason why abortions are being considered. & while sex outside of marriage is a part of why, it isn't the ultimate reason or the only reason. Many women who have abortions are married. & simple abstinance isn't the solution.

That having been said, I am all for abstinance based sex ed. Here in DBQ that is what our schools teach. & the Pro-lifers here strongly support that approach as well. & we are battling Planned Parenthood's attempts to bring their version of sex ed into the school. & beleive me, there is a lot of support in some sectors for letting PP do so. & their supporters do so using the claim that teaching the kids safe sex is the way to reduce abortions.

But the reality is, even with the students being taught abstinance there will still be those who do get pregnant & seek out an abortion. So, simply talking about abstinance, or putting a huge emphasis on it isn't enough. We have to talk loud & clear about what abortion is & why it is wrong. The other side isn't goint to stop pushing for it & promoting it, so we can't reduce our efforts to speak out against it.

That doesn't mean we can't also talk more about abstinance before marriage as well. The 2 are not mutually exclusive.

That leads me to the women who have an abortion after marriage. Many of those women have abortions as a form of birth control & abstinance is not going to reduce that number in any way, shape or form. While some may be open to learning about natural family planning, not all are. & in my experience, most abortion supporters don't welcome NFP as a viable option. Again here in DBQ Right to Life people do a lot to get the NFP message out. & thanks to a recent e-mail I got, I realized that I hadn't gotten arround to even putting up some links to NFP sites. I have since corrected that.

This gets me to the ultimate reason for abortion. It is selfishness in some form or another for the huge majority of them Selfishness on the part of the father who doesn't want to be bothered so he pressures the woman into the abortion, selfishness on the part of the man &/or woman that doesn't want to wait until marriage. selfishness on the part of the married couple who doesn't want a child to ruin the good life they have without children. Selfishness on the part of a married man &/or woman who rejects the concepts being NFP & don't want to take the responsiblities that using NFP requires. (Note: Properly using NFP is not selfishness in any way, shape or form. & those couples who do get pregnant in those rare occasions where they get pregnant unexpectedly, don't consider abortion. They welcome the child.)

Other times it is the selfishness of the grandparents that forces a woman to have the abortion.

I can here someone saying "What about in the case of incest or rape?" Obviously, I don't see them as reasons to ever justify abortion That having been said, at times selfihsness may even play a part there. In the case of rape, the woman is obviously the victim & deserves all the help she can get. She needs to know an abortion won't solve her problems, just make them worse. In the case of incest, selfishness comes in in the form of the attempt by (depending on the circumstances) 1 or both parties to cover up their actions. &, again depending on the circumstances, it may only be 1 of the 2 who wants to protect him/herself. I am trying very hard here not to oversimplify things. In the case of rape & incest there are many factors that enter in besides selfishness & I do not mean to downplay any of them.

Providing alternatives to abortion for women who are pregnant outside of marriage for any reason is important. That is where groups like Birthright & Care Net come in. Helping those who are victims of rape & incest is also needed. & helping those who have been hurt by abortion is important as well.

But to say "we are going crazy protesting against Abortions" sounds more like something abortion supporters says to try & get us to shut up. & they are doing so because they know we are being heard & our message is having an effect. Now, I am not saying this is what motivated James, I don't know. I just know that our speaking out about abortion is not crazy, any more than the long loud continuous speaking out against slavery or the Nazi attrocities in WW II was. We cannot be silent, nor can we talk any less about abortion. As I said earlier, that does not exclude more efforts to promote abstinance, NFP & the rest either. We must still continue to fight to end abortion, just seeing less of them is not enough.