Reclaiming Fatherhood II

Last October I talked about a conference entitled Reclaiming Fatherhood that was being held in San Francisco in November of 2007. The conference was an success.

I am happy to report that there will be a 2nd Reclaiming Fatherhood conference. The conference, Reclaiming Fatherhood: A Multifaceted Examination of Men Dealing with Abortion, will be held on 8-9 September 2008. It will be held at Chicago Marriott Oak Brook, 1401 W 22nd St., Oak Brook, IL 60523. Once again it is being put on by National Office of Post-Abortion Reconciliation and Healing (NOPARH) & is sponsored by the Archdiocese of Chicago & The Knights of Columbus.

Why a conference on men dealing with abortion? (From the Reclaiming Fatherhood website)

The impact of an abortion experience on men is unrecognized by many. Men are hidden partners in every abortion decision. More than 40 million abortions have occurred in the U.S. alone since abortion was legalized here. Worldwide the estimates are that more than 43 million abortions occur in a year. In every abortion decision there is a male involved in some way. The man’s role or lack of role in the decision can create a stream of consequences that may accompany the man through the rest of his life. Because men are told they have no say in the abortion decision--that it is about a woman and her choice--they later struggle with the questions they pose to themselves and the emotions they feel. Men often say "I don't feel entitled to my grief. It was her choice. Why do I feel so badly?" More men are recognizing that abortion was a life changing event for them. The difficulty for the man who wants to process the experience, is that there are few resources available to him. Mental health professionals have not recognized that an abortion loss may be a significant event in the life of a man. Addiction counselors, grief facilitators and clergy may not recognize the unresolved grief of an abortion experience that may have occurred many years ago. We are not sensitized to the ways that a hidden loss may play itself out in the lives of those who experience it.

This conference is designed to bring to the forefront what is known about how pregnancy may impact the male partner, the various roles a male can play in an abortion decision, and the implications of reproductive technology as it pertains to fatherhood. The research findings on men and abortion will be presented. It will look at what happens when a male experiences trauma as well as provide information on how men process grief or try to hide from their grief. Men’s spiritual growth as it pertains to the process of healing will be examined and a model of forgiveness therapy will be discussed. Some current models for outreach to men will be presented.

I have said before that men are often the forgotten victim in the tragedy that is abortion. Abortion is NOT the nice neat solution to the problem of an unwanted pregnancy. It kills the child. It harms the mother emotionally, & it harms the father of the child as well. If you have any doubts that it doesn't hurt the father, just ask my friend (& co-producer of Bella) Jason Jones. He'll tell you from 1sthand experience the hurt caused to a father from the death of a child due to abortion.

If you are someone who has been hurt by abortion, please get the help for the healing. I have plenty of links in the column to the right to groups that can help. If you know someone who has been hurt by an abortion, love him/her. Support your friend & help bring him/her to Jesus where that friend can be healed & set free. It is never too late to be set free. Jesus is waiting with open loving arms. His Mercy is greater than any hurt.

& if you deal with men hurt by abortion in a pastoral or clinical setting, this conference looks to me to be able to provide some excellent tools for you to use to help them be set free from their pain & hurt.